Feeling Old

It's June.  

Can't believe it's June already.  Seems like this year is just whizzing by!  Every time I blink some new thing is happening or some new milestone in our life is starting.

June is an important month around here.  The firstborn becomes a teenager officially this month.  She has been a teenager in attitude since about 5 but she is officially a teenager in a week!  Can't believe it.

We're in that phase of life where it is the end of the world to get our picture taken, it's embarrassing to be seen with Mom and Dad, and we just don't know where we are going in life.  She's growing up so fast.  Hard to believe that just 13 years ago I was not really ready to be a mom, and guess what I still don't feel like I am ready to be a mom!  She has taught me a lot as I am trying to teach her.  Can't believe how fast life is moving and how much she is growing and maturing.  

At 13...Janea  enjoys

arguing...both for fun and in debate

theater...both watching and performing

superheroes and their movies

Dr. Who...if the TARDIS ever shows up I am sure she will join the doctor

Zombies and "real" vampires...not the Twilight ones

Love my firstborn, my teenager, the one who keeps me on my toes!

A Month of "Mayhem"

Anyone else feel like the month of May is moving too fast?

It's only the 7th and I already feel like it should be over.

May is important in our family for many different reasons but this May is extra hectic....so far this month this has happened.

May 2-3:  "I HATE SHAKESPEARE"--Janea was in her first school production as a middle -school student.  She did a great job!  I am one proud Mama and look forward to supporting her through many more productions!

May 3-5  Fishing with Grandma and Grandpa!  We went down for Kids Fishing Day at Bennett Spring...love this place but it was COLD!  We got a record snow in May here in the great midwest!  Usually the first of May is warm and nice...this weekend not so much but we still had a great time and the kids enjoyed fishing, feeding the fish and hanging out with their grandparents~

May 4th was also a big day as my wonderful parents celebrated their 40th Wedding Anniversary!  I pray that Dan and I are able to have as productive a marriage as my parents have!

May 6th--Beautiful weather returned and we decided to enjoy an evening at the park.  Jayden loves the park!  As we were going I remembered that our church had a fundraiser for our Mexico team at Burger King...so we went and supported them and I didn't have to cook.

This week has brought Wax Museum of Famous Missourians for Jaron and he dressed up and did a speech on Walter Elias Disney for his Famous Missourian.

Janea is finishing up her Map Testing and working on finishing the school year with many research projects.

Wednesday is AWANA awards night for Jaron

Thursday is Dan's birthday and Muffins with Mom for me and Jayden at our school.

The weekend ahead is full of Mother's Day and Calvary's commencement for my parents....and until school's out I don't think we get to have a breather as we have upcoming meetings and inductions into NJHS for Janea!

Thankful for a busy month and enjoyable things!

31 days and Counting

Can you believe that January is over?

I can't, I mean this month has flown by.  Tomorrow is the first day of February and so it's time to evaluate my goals.

Some questions that I have asked myself today, as I thought about what I should write. 

Have I made progress?  Yes,

I feel that I am making good progress on where my focus needs to be.  I need to live in the moment, to chose to look on the positive and not get caught up in the wrongness of things.  I need to embrace life and not get bogged down or obsessed when I am not doing the right thing.

Am I still in the same place?  No,

When the new year started I was in a low place.  I'm moving up the mountain, I'm not at the top by any means and I slip down from time to time but I'm emotionally feeling better, I'm also not as tired.  The toddler is sleeping much better and that is helping in so many ways!  

I've also experienced some good changes at work this month.  I am back to working 40 hours a week(38.5 after breaks)  and a new classroom.  So far, it seems to be a good fit and I am having fun bringing things in the classroom and trying to play dynamic lessons...I will have to blog about the stressful year I had at the beginning and how this is much better but this is not the time or place...

What do I still need to work on?

Everything!

I haven't mastered any of it yet.  It's very easy for me to slip back into the pettiness of it all, to that place where I don't like who I am.  That selfish state of being and wanting everything to go my way and to be magically fixed.

What is my goal for the upcoming month?

Love.

Love is my goal for February...I think it is fitting with Valentines Day and all.  

I want my family to feel and understand that I love them for who they are, not what they do for me.  I need to be an example of love to my husband and the kids.  I need to appreciate them and show them love.

Sometimes I am not the most loving and I need to work on this.  To love without condition, without strings attached.  To show love and be loved in return, to have a selfless love the way God loves me.  Love is important and it is my goal for the upcoming month.

How about you friends? 

Has January been an uplifting month?

Have you made progress on your goals?

Please feel free to comment or encourage as we endeavor to make 2013 a great year!

Toddler Tales: Tubes in, Noid's Out!

I've decided to add some new segments to the blog.  I really enjoy stories from other mom's and I thought that I would add some of the fun that we have with the Toddler...thus I birthed the idea of Toddler Tales. 

However today's tale will not be a funny tale but a record of a medical procedure.

It was dark outside...my early morning alarm clock on my phone started buzzing and I thought to myself..."why is this going off so early, then I remembered...we have to be at the hospital by 6:30 so I better get up"...20 minutes later I finally actually get up.  I'm tired, I haven't slept well at all, I've been rather keyed up knowing that tomorrow is a big day for the Toddler...he's getting Tubes put in and having his adenoids taken out.  I finally fell into a deep sleep after 3 and then the alarm went off at 5:00!  

I get up, get dressed, and find that Jayden is already awake. An hour earlier than normal, he must realize that something is going on today.  So we go on our ritual morning adventure of making sure everyone is still home...they are, the only other one up is Dan, and he is getting ready for work.  I've make lunches for the big kids and put them on the kitchen table, remind everyone of what needs to be done before school and made sure the big kids are awake and then I leave with Jayden, we are off to Grandma's to pick her up before we head to Harrisonville and the hospital.

I pick up my mom at 6:10 and we head south.  The 20 minute drive to Harrisonville seems longer than normal in the dark, it's pitch black and I'm tired, Jayden is happy in the back seat and isn't aware of what will be happening in a little over an hour.  It's nice to have company of another adult, Dan and I had decided to have him work today and me tomorrow, and we would take turns and today is my turn. I know he is worried but we are trusting and praying that everything will be okay. I'm very grateful my mom is with me and the conversation is keeping me  distracted.

We pull into the hospital parking lot at 6:30, it's really empty, there are not alot of people at the hospital yet.  We get our stuff out of the car and walk into the building.  A man behind the front desk says, "Tubes surgery?"  We reply, "yes".  He then comments on he figured since the only time little ones come in so early is usually on Thursday's(this is the day that the ENT does surgery) and today is Thursday so we must be here to get tubes in Jayden's ears.  

We are escorted to the surgery section and check in, it doesn't take long and I had made sure to have our ID and cards very easily accessible.  Mom and Jayden look at a book while we wait, we have our choice of seats in the waiting room, as we are the first ones.  We wait maybe 5 minutes and then we are escorted back to the prep room.


It's a nice little room and the nurse who will be taking care of us is super nice.  She goes over everything with us and we make sure we know his weight and height and by this point Jayden is starting to wonder what is going on. I try and distract him with my phone on my camera

Here's a picture we took on Grandma waiting and helping to keep Jayden happy.

The other is of Jayden as he has on his gown and is getting prepped, he really didn't like the gown and by the time it was time for him to go back he had taken it off.  He ended up not wearing the gown for the surgery, just his pants and socks!  Poor baby!



By this point, we have met with the Anesthesiology doctor and nurse, Dr. Luce our ENT and met lots of nurses.  I have signed that I understand what is happening and what to expect and that I trust the doctors and nurses to provide excellent care.   I have confirmed my babies identity and my identity and we are ready for the surgery.  

The moment I have been worried about is here.   I breathe a silent prayer, kiss him on the cheek and pass him to the nurse who whisks him away to the operating room.  He is reaching for me and calling "Mama, Mama, and crying,"  It's hard to see him leave but I know he needs this procedure and I have peace.  

Mom and I head to the waiting room.   We have around 45 minutes before we will hear anything, so we head to get a drink from the cafeteria and use the restroom and then we sit and wait for the surgery to be over.  About 35 minutes later, Dr. Luce comes out and lets us know the procedure went well, he did have an infection behind his left ear and he had huge adenoids.  She lets us know he may be cranky and what to expect and that we will get to see him soon.  

Poor baby!  Groggy after surgery.

10-15 minutes go by and I go and use the restroom one more time before we go back to him.  After another 10 minutes I am a little bit anxious and then they finally let me go back to my baby.  He is awake!  Poor thing,he is groggy, disoriented and not happy at all.  He is drinking apple juice and coming around and the nurses say he is doing well.  I get to hold and snuggle him and make sure that he gets some calories in him.  We text Daddy and Grandpa and let them know he is okay. And then we finish the recovery process.

By 9:25 we are able to go home.  At 9:30 we are in the car leaving the parking lot.  In and out in 3 hours.  I take my mom home and then Jayden and I go home to hang out and feel better.  

We eat, drink and play.  Take a long afternoon nap and with the exception of get cranky and fussy faster he seems to be doing pretty well.  He'll be home a few more days and then we will go back to our normal routines of life!

Busy Boy

Jayden loves to help in the kitchen and be doing whatever I am doing.  One night as I was cleaning the kitchen he was simply in the way and so I decided he needed to be kept occupied.  I filled up the sink with warm soapy water, filled it with containers he could pour and dump and let him have at it.  Kept him occupied for at least half an hour and I was able to finish what I was doing! 

Saying Goodbye

Jayden and his 3 adopted sisters from Miss Maria's house!

We were so blessed to have Jayden is a wonderful home daycare situation from the time I went back to work.  My school starts at 12 months and walking and so we knew the day would come when he would leave her care and go to Parkwood Day School with me.  That was the beginning of this month.  Jayden had his last day of care with Maria on August 3rd.  We miss her and her family very much.

Captain Spaghetti Face

Hi!  You want some of my yummy dinner?

What??

I can't believe that!

Its so yummy!   What makes you think that I like this?  Do I have something on my face?

What can I say!  This boy eats spaghetti with all his worth and really enjoys it!  YUMMY!

My Quirky Kids

As the kids are getting older, maturing their personalities are so different from each other.  I'm getting to know these guys as they mature and change and develop and it's fun and exhausting all at the same time.

Janea is her own person.  At times she is sweet and loving, at other times she is smart and sassy most of the time lately she seems to be grumpy.  She is growing into her teen age self and struggling with being 12.  She's excited about being in 7th grade and yet at the same time I feel like her defensiveness is just a way of keeping her guard up.  We are working on helping her to grow into lady full of grace and beauty but it is a hard and challenging process.

Jaron is full of energy and VOLUME!  Seriously, I don't think he understands the meaning of be quiet.  He is the one who we are constantly reminding to turn down his volume and calm down.  He does everything full of gusto.  He is a great big brother to Jayden, an annoying little brother to Janea and we are working on having him be more of Dan's helper on things.

Jayden is quite the charmer when he wants to, a screamer when he wants something, a give me what I want or I will throw a fit kid, he's either happy or sad...there really isn't a middle ground with him.  It's challenging to be starting over with the toddler phase but we are enjoying it too.  I won't lie, I will not be sad when he is potty trained!  I don't enjoy diapers.

So that's some of what I have been thinking about lately!  Love my kiddos!

10 months old

My big and happy boy is almost 1!  I can't believe how quickly this year has gone by!  I also can't believe he still isn't sleeping through the night.

at 10 months Jayden is:

24 pounds and 31.5 inches

7 full teeth and one coming in

crawling and pulling up on everything

not sleeping through the night

an eating machine...favorites include yogurt and fruits

shows love by giving hugs

full of energy!



Difference a Year Makes

I've been reflecting on the changes that have occured over the last year.  The difference I see and the perspective I have gained are great.  I'm thankful

Winter:  Last winter I was STRESSED out.  We had a very very Snowy winter complete with a Blizzard!  This winter has been warm, we have had less than an inch of snow for the entire winter so far and I've not had to worry about snow days at all.  In fact, some days I have had to remind the kids to wear a coat!  What a difference a year makes.

Baby:  Last year I was pregnant and freaking out that I couldn't be a mom to 3.  Well, turns out I can be a mom to 3.  The baby is doing really well, we are enjoying him very much.  It's hard work to have a baby in the house but I do have a great husband and helpful big kids and that makes it great.  We also have been so blessed with a wonderful babysitter who takes such great care of Jayden so I can work. 

JOB:  It's nice to have a job I like.  Last year I was contemplating quitting and freaking out about finances.  This year I have a great job, looking forward to summer and next year and I genuinelly enjoy what I am doing.  I have a rough class at times but honestly I love what I do!

So that's a bit of a difference between then and now. I certainly enjoying what I am doing now and this year more than my memory of last year.

8 Month's Old

It's Getting harder to get Jayden's picture every months sitting next to his bear!  He is a wiggling, giggling, squirming, crawling, exploring machine!  But here is our cutie before the Chicken Pox!

Some Stats and Facts for 8 Month's Old

• Full on Crawling
• 24.5 pounds and 30 inches long!
• Blueberry Yogurt is one of our favorite foods
• Learning how to wave hi and bye....or just for fun...we wave alot!
• Starting to pull ourself to standing!
• Screams for attention, fun and at people when shopping!
• Loves to be where the action is
• Able to find the smallest spot and then try to crawl through it and finds ourself getting stuck!
• Finally sleeping more consistently and only waking up typically once at night!~(Mommy is very grateful for this one!)
• A true joy to the family!

Jaron's Birthday Party

Aunt Wendy came from Omaha for the weekend!

Grandma makes the best birthday cakes and fun decorations for the table!  Love parties at Grandmas!

Jayden enjoyed the balloons!

What's more fun than sitting on your sister and a balloon to celebrate being 9!

Tell me the truth....does this do anything for my hair???

We had a party with Grandma and Grandpa to celebrate Jaron's birthday!  So much fun to be with the family and celebrate our awesome 9 year old boy!

Happy Birthday Jaron

Jaron turned Nine on October 26th!  I can't believe how old he is now!  It seems like he was a baby just a few years ago....I love this kid to pieces

At nine Jaron is:

fun

energetic

LOUD!!!

exuberant

lover of all things Wii and DSi

Super excited by little things

Growing up

3rd Grader

Awesome Reader

Math Machine

Jesus Follower

Big Brother

All around Super kid!

We love you Buddy!  Have a great year being 9!

6 months old!

Look I pulled him over!  FUNNY STUFF!

Aren't I a big and happy boy!

These are my toes and I love them!

Look Mommy I'm helping you put away the groceries!

These are my diapers....mine!

Jayden turned 6 months old on Monday!  Wow Time is sure moving fast!  At 6 months he is

• rolling over both ways
• army crawling and scootching
• giggling, laughing and playful
• eating solid foods
• sitting up for long stretches without assistance
• thouroughly enjoying the great outdoors
• sleeping for longer 6-8 hour stretches(PTL!)
• around 22 pounds and super long
• wearing 12 month old clothes!

He truly is a joy and blessing to our lives!

Fall Fun

We got Cider donuts at Dunn Cider Mill!  So good!

We went downtown to see the Kaufman Center for the Performing Arts for Grandpa's Birthday!  Didn't make it inside but really enjoyed walking around Downtown!

Jayden's first trip to a pumpkin patch!  Doesn't he just look thrilled!

Mommy  what's this stuff???  I think I like it!

I love FALL!

I really do...I think it has to be my favorite season! We are enjoying getting to do fun fall activities and enjoying time as a family!  It's also a lot of fun introducing Jayden to all the fun stuff that Fall brings!

Calmness

Whew...the weekend is over, and we are getting back to our daily routine.

This morning was harder than our typical mornings here at home.  The kids were moving at a different pace, the weather is cooler so we had to find jackets to wear along with our shorts, the lunch boxes almost didnt' make it into the backpacks...a very untypical morning for us.

I have my routine in the morning...and I like it and it works for us...just not after a holiday weekend.

Yesterday was a nice day of chores, hanging out as a family, and a nice evening walk at the park followed by Daddy treating us to Shaved Ice for the final tiime of the summer.  The shaved ice place is now closed for the season...we didn't go as often this summer but that's okay...we enjoyed our times of yumminess...now we are looking forward to Apple Cider donuts on a Saturday morning and going to the pumpkin patch.

It's becoming more fall like...the temperatures are ideal...we are waiting and hoping for employment for me and taking things one step at a time...it's a calmness...and we like it!

4 Months Old!

Jayden is 4 months old today!  I can't believe he has been here a third of a year already!  He is a happy growing boy and we love him to pieces!

To see how much he has grown please click here for pictures from his first 3 months

The Bilirubin Diaries

Bilirubin (formerly referred to as hematoidin) is the yellow breakdown product of normal heme catabolism. Heme is found in hemoglobin, a principal component of red blood cells. Bilirubin is excreted in bile and urine, and elevated levels may indicate certain diseases. It is responsible for the yellow color of bruises, urine (via its reduced breakdown product, urobilin), and the yellow discoloration in jaundice.


Bilirubin...the stuff that causes Jaundice has been rampant in our little newborn.

Tuesday April 12...Jayden has a bilirubin level of 9.6 as we leave the hospital this is considered borderline but it is relatively low so I wasn't really worried.  Our hospital pediatrician recommends that he be seen by our family doctor by Friday.

Thursday April 14th..Jayden is looking a little orange and my mom comments that I might want to get that checked out...I agree and schedule an appointment for the next morning...

Friday April 15th...Jayden is looking mighty orange.  My mom and I take him to the doctor and he recommends a bilirubin test so after heading to the hospital lab we get done and take him home.  The doctor's office calls and tells me that his number is now double...18.2  and he is concerned and thinks we need to be seen at Children's Mercy for a second opinion.  I'm a little panicked at this point...and between my mom and I and Dan we get him to Children's Mercy.  They decide to admit him to have some intense photo therapy...so that began one of the longest nights that I have experienced in my kids lives.

At 7:00 Dan and I left to grab dinner...Jayden started out in the isolette unit and was doing well so we felt comfortable leaving and I was STARVING and I could not stomach the thought of hospital food...we returned by 8:00 where the nurse let us know that Jayden was hungry and fussy...so I nursed him and we got him back in to the isolette as he was only able to come out for half hour periods every 2 hours...I am exhausted at this point and Dan has me lay down on the bed in the room and he takes a shift....Jayden really isn't liking the light box at this point and is squirming, crying and kicking...so either Dan or I had to take turns holding in a binky and rubbing his back, head or feet to help him remain calm...we go through 2 hours of this and feed him again...then the nurse comes to do a bilirubin level on him.  His level is now 16.5  down almost a full 2 points in 3 hours.

The doctor comes in a little later and we were basically told that we had over reacted and that Jayden would be fine and that it's normal and no big deal...well we were simply following the advise of medical professionals and we would not have done the hospital if it hadn't been recommended...well, she tells us we can go home if we want or stay...it's up to us...we decide to head home and around 12:30 we finally get home.

Saturday April 16th...Dan rigs up some plant lights and we sit under them for the entire day...keeping Jayden in the "sunshine"  by the end of the day his skin is looking much better...and we are encouraged by his progress.

Sunday April 17th...We don't go to church and spend the morning sitting under lights...the afternoon is spent cleaning house, mowing the lawn and other such projects.

Monday April 18th...first day for mom to be in charge of car duty...Baby has appointment with doctor at 11.  Doctor is encouraged by the way his skin looks and has us do another bilirubin test at the lab...and Praise God his level is now 13.5 and dropping!  So it looks like the saga of the bilirubin will soon be over!

We are thankful for modern medicine and that our baby will be okay!

Things I Had Forgotten

Since we have not had an infant in the house since Jaron was a baby I had forgotten what life with a newborn is like.

I forgot what it feels like to be so tired.  We've been home only 2 nights and already I feel like I will not really sleep again.  I forgot what it feels like to get up with someone in the middle of the night.

I forgot how tiring a newborn can be...they don't really do anything but they are exhausting...I think it's from the nursing and trying to establish a pattern.

I forgot how much your body changes and how hard it works to get a baby out...I forgot that it takes weeks to get your strength completely back.

I forgot how happy a little one can make you.  The sweetness of a baby and just the wonder that you helped to bring this little one into the world.  I forgot how the world seems to stop just because you have had a baby.

I've forgotten a lot but I am remembering and enjoying this new little person.  I'm really tired and very thankful for the fact that my parents have been able to help us out!  Dan's already back to work so I am home with the baby by myself but I am not as overwhelmed as I was when Janea and Jaron were little.  So it's a good thing...Jayden is doing well and we are learning how to be a family of 5!

Wordless Wednesday